Year-end Tag

Just Another Blogger

Savio had tagged me for this post in the last week of December but I took my own sweet time to do it! Thank you Savio for pushing me back to writing.

If God grants you an instant wish.. what would you ask for?

– I think I will be clueless! Will not know what to answer. There are so many things that I want, but not sure if I should bother God for it. He will give me what I deserve.

How well do you know yourself?

Well, that’ a tricky one! the moment I think I know myself like back of my hand, I surprise myself by doing something or reacting in a particular way which will make me think “Aditi, is it you really??” I think no one can know oneself completely – it is a continuous journey, because we keep changing as per the time and situation, right? We keep learning, we keep progressing.

What do you think about a bloggers meet up?

– Why not! Would be great to meet fellow bloggers in person.

If you could transform into any animal what would it be?

– It has to be a Tiger. I hear they sleep for 18 hours!!! And sleeping is my favorite activity. Plus, people will be scared of me… hahahahahha.

Favorite book.

– So far, “The Laws of The Spirit World”. It is totally a game changer. Changed the way I look at life, taught me a lot.

Do you think true love exists?

– Of course!!! Not just in movies but in real life too!!!

Ego or anger? Which one damages the most?

– I would say both! Anger is like sever heart attack while Ego is like a Cancer. Both kill you sooner or later.

What do you want to become?

– A mother 🙂

Do you believe that there would be a third part in the movie Bahubali?

– YES!!! And I will watch it too if it is released.

Name one thing you do that always feels right.

– Letting go. It is important to let go. Hoarding on to things, matters, fights etc doesnt do any good.

Where do you draw the most inspiration from your blog?

– From what I see around, and from some genius tags that Savio does 😉

Favorite country?

– Has to be India, I havent known any other country yet

What is a relationship breaker for you?

– Ego

Would you ever take back someone who cheated?

– YES – if I really love that person, I would definitely give a second chance. But not a third! 😉

If you’re in a bad mood, do you prefer to be left alone or have someone cheer you up?

– I just need my husband. I just need to see him around, it is ok if he doesn’t cheer me up, but he should be around.

 Are you confidential?

– YES – I only share EVERYTHING with my husband, nobody else. And that is safe, ok? Most of the times he turns a deaf year to my chatter

What’s the one thing people always misunderstand about you?

– That I have too much attitude.

What did your past relationship teach you?

– Some things are meant to not happen and it is for your best.

What job would you be terrible at?

– Scientist or a Mathematician, may be? Actually anything that involves using too much brain.

If you could turn any activity into an Olympic sport, what would you have a good chance of winning a medal for?

– Non-stop chatter 🙂

What would be your first question after waking up from being cryogenically frozen for 100 years?

– Who am I?

What have you only recently formed an opinion about?

– Beggars! I just did a post on them some time back

What is the most annoying question people ask you?

– Nothing really, I dont get annoyed too easily

What is something a ton of people are obsessed with but you just don’t get the point of?

– Updates on Social Media

What one thing do you really want but can’t afford?

– World Tour

What did you think you would grow out of but haven’t?

– Controlling tears.

What do you wish your brain was better at doing?

– I think it is doing a good job.

If you had to change your name, what would you change it to?

– No way! I will never change my name

What would be the most annoying thing to someone who has you as a roommate?

– The mess that I create. I just love to throw my clothes on the bed after changing.

Have you ever saved someone’s life?

– How I wish, but no, I haven’t

Mr Savio, I have completed this tag! Promise is a promise!

I nominate:

PoojaVinayakSanober – Guys, this is interesting. I hope you will participate! Hopefully, this will be fun, if not, use it like a filler on the days you want to post something but cannot think of anything. Please feel free to modify the tag name, like New Year Tag or Just Another Blogger – basically anything that you like.

 

 

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Pity or Unmoved – Not Sure What to Feel!

Beggars

I have been in this dilemma for a very long time now. I just cant figure out how am I supposed to feel. A part of me says I should feel pity and do something for these guys. But seconds later another part of me says I need not, since it is nothing more than a gimmick.

Well, I am talking about the beggars that crowd near cars at traffic signals. I hate calling them beggars, but I am sorry, they don’t do anything more than begging. There are some who try to sell some petty articles like pens and stickers or balloons, but i will call it masked begging. Because they force you to buy those articles even when you don’t need them and they will never let you go with buying just one, they will force many more.

So, every signal our car halts at, we see many beggars approaching us and all other cars there. Initially, that is like 4 years ago, we would give money very willingly and these guys seemed contented with that. But of late, there seems to be an upgrade to their modus operandi. A penny never pleases them, they always want more. It is extremely heart breaking to see crippled people crowding the cars and asking for money. Ideally, it is supposed to evoke immense sympathy for them but things seem to be changing now. Each time the cars halts at the signal, we roll up the windows (mostly we travel with windows down, both of us like fresh air compared to AC) thus avoiding any contact with these beggars. Most other cars do the same. There will be few who will bother to give some money but that doesn’t move us. Really!

I mean, when I think, there will be children who look able to work but yet are seen begging. There are adults who fake disability and ask for alms. Why do these guys do nothing better than begging. Why cant they earn money in a different manner? I understand that these days, beggar trafficking (that’s what i like to call) is no less than human trafficking and perhaps all these able people who beg are trapped and forced to do so, but, really is there no way out? Not sure! On the other hand, some people could be really crippled, I mean you can see it really, like and amputated leg or a plucked eye. But unfortunately, these guys get a cold shoulder because of able beggars.

Beggars are mostly ignored these days, and why not? They don’t seem genuine to me. Each time I meet a beggar, I ask if he would like to eat something and 99% of them refuse and say they just need money. Even if you give them money, they will never seem to be satisfied with a tenner. So what is it like? Give them a hundred? I am like WOW – there is definitely something more to it than just what they try to show – like – they could be hungry really – but not for food, for money! Will a very needy person who goes to the extent of begging will refuse food? May be these guys are a part of a larger group who are given targets for collections? May be it is their job? May be they get some incentives if they over achieve their targets for the day? May be they are tormented if they do not bring in money? I don’t know!

What I know is I cant allow myself to keep giving money to everybody who knocks at my car’s window. It is unfortunate that they have to do it, but am I really responsible for it? What hurts me more is – I miss a chance to help somebody who really is in need. God forgive me for that!

This confuses me to no end! I can’t figure out whether I should feel pity or unmoved!

How do you guys handle such people?

The Forgoten Past

Raghav was sitting across Ayesha with his heart filled with hope. It was 100th time or perhaps even more that he was attempting this conversation with her. After all, this was all he was trying to do since past 3 months.

These 3 months were the toughest of his life. He just could not bear to see the unfamiliarity in Ayesha’s eyes and he couldn’t bear her hesitation when he touched her. Even the platonic touch of a hand shake seemed so forced. There were days when they couldn’t keep their hands off each other but today everything had changed.

Actually, to be precised things changed 4 months ago when they met with an unlikely accident. Raghav and Ayesha were honeymooning in New Zealand. Both loved adventure and were very excited to try the adventure sport called “Heaven Chair”. They just loved the idea of being tied together to an open chair car and being thrown down and suspended from many 100s of feet. They had tried similar sports many times before and the fear never touched their minds. Thanks to all the successful adventures they had so far. Little did they know that the Heaven Chair was actually going to make their life hell.

The unexpected happened and the Heaven Chair hit the edge of the mountain repeatedly while surrendering to gravity and Raghav doesn’t remember what happened after that. The accident was so bad that it was a miracle that Raghav and Ayesha survived through this. Raghav was recovering from multiple fractures and an amputated leg while Ayesha slipped into coma for a month. The fall had damaged some nerve in the brain and when she revived from coma she had lost her memory completely.

It was 3 months that Ayesha had come out of coma and Raghav was making peace with an artificial leg. Raghav was not upset with his lost leg and numerous scars all over his body as much as he was with the fact that Ayesha refused to recognize him.

He was trying so hard to bring back her memory but nothing worked. He held her hand with the hope that perhaps she will find the touch familiar but instead she jerked her hand off each time. He showed her their wedding photographs thinking that perhaps she may recall at least something but instead she accused him of having photoshopped those pictures. He narrated to her how they had met 10 yrs ago and how did they fall in love thinking that the depth of love they shared until 3 months ago may do the trick but alas!

Today was no different. Raghav tried doing all these things all over again. Ayesha looked unmoved. In fact, she looked frustrated and waited with a straight face for Raghav to get done.

Minutes after Raghav ran out of his tricks, Ayesha pulled out some papers and handed them over to Raghav.

“Raghav, we can’t keep doing this. I trust you when you say we are married but none of your stories evoke any kind of feelings or memories in me. I feel trapped in an imaginary world. I feel intimidated by your so called love. Please, get these signed when you come to meet me next time. Let us set each other free”

Ayesha picked her bag and left. Raghav kept staring at the divorce notice that was just handed to him.

10 years of love and 7 days of marriage succumbed to 4 months of memory loss!

Inspired by daily prompt: Evoke

Thank You 2017!

Buddha

Happy New Year to all of you! Those who remember me must be wondering where have I been for so many months, and those who have already forgotten me, well, no offence 🙂 The rule of “Out of Sight Out of Mind” does work!

I had been away for second half of 2017 and it was for good! Thankfully, it was not because of depression or anything, but because some really great developments that happened in my personal life. I am totally overwhelmed with these developments and I can’t thank God enough. While all this time when I was away and busy in unfolding these developments, I learnt 4 key things which I want to share with you all.

  1. Everything has it’s time: Most of us could be waiting for something, like a career opportunity, marriage, that dream trip, love, children etc. And we could have worked so hard to achieve it, yet we may not get the desired results. It is OK! Dont be surprised, it is really OK, what matter is that we tried. And our earnest efforts do bear fruits some day! Everything has its own time to happen, it will not happen when you want it to but it will certainly happen at the right time.
  2. Bow down: It is very important that we bow down in front of a supreme power. This supreme power could be anything and anybody that you look up to as superior than yourself. Be it God, parents, Guide or just any other power. It is very important to surrender in front of this power. It is only then that you see clear what lies ahead. In other words, it means that by bowing down or surrendering yourself you clean yourself from a part of ego or self esteem. Slowly you travel towards modesty and humbleness. Only polite talks do not make one modest, actions do!
  3. Don’t Lose hope: Well, you must have heard this from many, read this in many books but it is very very true. It is very easy to give up and it is very difficult to hang on, but friends, perhaps what God tests before giving us what we want is our will-power to achieve that thing. Just keep going, be focused and keep faith that you will get what you deserve!
  4. Stay away from negativity: Little do we realize that we are surrounded by a great amount of negativity. That complaining woman who cribs about everything in her life, that frustrated man who keeps saying that good happens only to others, that upset person who says efforts are never paid for – all of them are spreading negativity. Stay away from these. Stay away from people who are rigidly negative. Plant a hope in your heart and nurture it. If you stay with negativity, this hope dies out very soon. Negative influence makes you do negative actions. Thus, you may end up doing bad for yourself, and even worse, you may never realize that you are paving your path to the grave.

You all may be wondering what happened to me all of a sudden? Why did I turn so spiritual? Well, time teaches you a lot! And these 6 months taught me things which life couldn’t teach me in last 33 years.

I know I may not have made complete sense. But at the same time I know, there will be some of you who will relate to at least one learning, sooner or later!

Wishing you a good, positive and healthy life!!

One In One Out Rule – The Best Way To Manage Emotions

This blog was first posted on mycity4kids.com

Sorrow to happy

The other day I was cleaning my house. It was not the routine of mopping and dusting but it was a conscious and planned effort to separate the essentials from the clutter. We often make spontaneous purchases but we don’t always use them. Some things just lie in the cupboard for no use. There are some other things which are now worn out or unusable but we don’t want to throw them because there are memories attached to it. All this eventually results in heaps and piles of unwanted things at home. Hence, I had planned to throw away at least 50% of the unwanted things that day so that I am able to make space for the things that I really need.

At the end of this cleaning session, I was surprised to see how much space was freed up in my wardrobe, how the kitchen looked clutter free and how the contents in other cupboards were neatly arranged. It brought in a fresh feeling! After all, who doesn’t like an organised house?

Then a thought crossed my mind. Why can’t we follow the same action for all the clutter that we have in our mind?

Lot of times, our mind is full of negative emotions like anger, frustration, envy, loneliness, guilt. We do not acknowledge these emotions because we sympathize with self thinking it is natural and just to be angry, frustrated in so and so situation. Meaning, I will obviously get angry if someone insults me. I will think that the person is very rude. I will hate that person. I will not talk nicely with that person. What am I doing here? I am dwelling on negative emotions which is wrong. It is natural to feel negative emotions but what is important is we let go.

Unless I let go these negative emotions how am I going to be able to make space for positive emotions? Same like cleaning my house! I suddenly felt like I found a key to happiness.

If I let negative emotions dwell on my mind, it will set me in an infinite loop of negativity and then it will be very difficult to break through this loop.

I remember a story that my dad used to tell me when I was small. It said, Happiness is deaf and Sorrow is blind. The more crib and cry regarding why you are made to suffer or the more you talk bad about others, sorrow will come searching for you taking help of the noise (cribbing) that you make. Where as since happiness is deaf it will not be able to hear how unhappy your are. However, if you distance yourself from crying and cribbing happiness will see some space and will come and occupy that space. It will spread happiness in that space in such a way that sorrow will not be able to make any damage to you.

As a child I could not understand the depth of this story, but when I grew up I realized how meaningful and important it is.

The best way is to practice One In One Out Rule. It is nothing but what I explained above. Take out one and make place for another! For example, if you are short tempered, make conscious efforts to get angry less often. It will not happen overnight but if you continue with your efforts it will certainly happen over a period of time. Once you are able to control your anger see how it makes way for calmness. As and how your anger (magnitude + frequency) will go on reducing, you will have more serenity and patience. Thus, one negative emotion goes out and one positive emotion comes in.

You are the best judge of yourself. Because only you will know how do you react and why do you react in that fashion. Find of things in you that need to go out. It could be anything like anger, laziness, fear/phobia, hatred etc. Be on a look out for good things that you want to gain like containment, happiness, patience, modesty etc. Work on yourself to throw out bad things and bring in good things.

Friends, most of the things in life are simple but we complicate them because of our reflexes and negative thoughts in our minds. And in order to have a calm and positive mind, it is very important to detox your mind periodically, like you detox your body.

This will help you to gain control over your emotions, rather right kind of emotions and it will certainly transform you  into a better individual.

Dr T. P Chia says:

“To balance and control your emotions is one of the most important things in life. Positive emotions enhance your life. Negative emotions sabotage your life. We all live at the mercy of our emotions. Our motions influence and shape our desires, thoughts and behaviors and above all our destiny. Positive emotions, such as the feelings of love, kindness, self-worth, confidence and optimism, produce a better person and a good destiny.”

Master the art of One In One Out and take charge of yourself, be a better individual!

Do share your experiences in comments section below.

Minion Madness!!!

Those who follow my blog would know that I am a Minion Fan.. jabra fan actually.

And guess what, the latest addition to my Minion collection is  earphones.

I ordered them from Amazon and these are just so cute, arent these??

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Now i am eyeing a Minion soft toy next, followed by Minion pillow.

Gifts and Charity is welcome!! 😅😜

Posted from WordPress for Android

No Matter How Old I Get I Always Want My Mom!

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This blog was first posted on mycity4kids.com

Mother is the first person you get close to when you are born. And it stays pretty much the same later in the life too 🙂

I remember that as a kid I was so attached to my mother that my dad used to tease that my mom should have had a kangaroo pouch and carry me close to her all the time. Well, I was really like that kid who would run around mom the whole day! I always ensured that i grabbed a little more pampering and attention from mom as compared to my sister.

We never had that relationship which is often described in novels and films, like, mother-daughter  friends or something like buddies. But my mother never failed to establish a relationship that made me feel loved, cared and pampered. For me, she is the best mother and I will tell you why!

1) She is “Love” personified. 

All mothers love their children selflessly and so does my mother! She has raised us with so much love and affection. I do not recall any ugly scene from childhood where she is beating or punishing me! I mean, I can’t imagine how much patience she must have had while raising us, endless perhaps. When I look at the moms of this generation I see them getting frustrated and angry at the drop of a hat and they do not think twice before exhibiting their anger and frustration on their children. I am sure that my mom was not devoid of any frustrations but it is commendable that she never bothered us with that. All that i recollect from my childhood is love, love and more love. Even today her heart is full of love and it is so pure that she easily forgives worldly mistakes of her daughters.

2) Fresh and Smiling face!

She is always fresh and smiling. There may be tonnes of tension and worry on her mind, but it will never show on her face. I have seen her facing difficult situations with a smile. 

3) Very Active:

I have always seen her racing through her schedule and I wonder where did she get all that stamina from! I just cook a little in the morning and then head to work and I am dead tired by the end of the day. I just can’t imagine from where my mom used to get the stamina to cook for a family of six, get us ready for the school, wash clothes, work at office, grocery shopping while returning from work, cooking dinner, and at the end of it all listen to my senseless and non-stop blabber 🙂

4) Pillar of Strength:

Yes, she is my pillar of strength. I am a grown up women now, but I still need her around. Lot of times there is nothing that she can help me with but just a chat with her that time eases my tension for sure. I am sure I have blown up atleast 100s of my tension over a chat with her.

5) Always there for me:

No matter what, my mom is ALWAYS there for me. Her plans, her hobbies, her everything comes after me. I remember my days of depression when I would call her up and cry for nothing in particular ending it with a statement “I am not feeling well” and there she wouldn’t mind coming over to my place just to make me feel better. I remember my sick days when she has nursed me and accompanied me to hospitals and toughest of medical examination. Whenever I tell her that I am going to drop by to see her she cancels all her plans without a shade of reluctance. This is indeed an epitome of selflessness.

6) Un-matchable upbringing:

She has provided us excellent upbringing. She has carved us out to be a good human being first and then assume the responsibility of various relations. She taught us politeness, patience and respect by setting an example herself. She has taught us to DEAL with the life as it comes, but with a brave heart and a smile on face. She has sowed the seeds of  love in us and this love has bloomed in our life. She has taught us to spread happiness.

I can’t imagine how I would have been had my mother been not around. My mom is a human form of God!

I am what I am today because of my mom. I hope to have at least an iota of her qualities. If I am able to follow her footsteps, I am sure to head to heaven!

Today I am not be able to cling to her like I used to as a child, but the love is still the same. Even today I cry when I miss my mom, the only difference is now i cry secretly versus the wailing I did as a baby 🙂 Even today I long to cuddle up with her while sleeping and even today I crave to eat food from her hands. Just like childhood days. The only difference is the ever running time which brushes a bit of maturity to you! My ways of demonstrating love to her may have changed over the years, the matured ways may not be as cute and loving as before, but the magnitude of love that myheart holds for her has only multiplied all these years. 

My mom is my inspiration!

Love you mom ❤ ❤

Here's fantastic quote I read which suits you to the core:

"Youth Fades,

Love Droops,

The leaves of friendship fall,

But a mother's secret hope outlives them all"

May God bless you with a healthy and long life!

Posted from WordPress for Android

Sometimes Less is More!

Less is More

Once I asked my maid whether she is willing to work at an Ayurveda clinic. I used to go for a treatment to this clinic and I personally knew all the staff there. We had become friends over a period of time and that’s how they had assigned me the task of finding a maid and i could not find anyone better than my own maid.

I: Mavshi, there is this clinic near Yogi Nagar. They are looking for someone who can work for them. There won’t be much work. Just sweeping and mopping twice a day, washing utensils of kadha (medicines) and wiping the treatment beds and cleaning the bathroom at the end of the day. Would you like to work there?

Maid: No!

I was super surprised to hear a plain No from her. I tried to persuade her.

I: Are Mavshi, they are going to pay well. 6000 Rs a month. You can leave all your jobs and just do this one, you will earn more. If you want you can keep couple of your current jobs to do in the evenings, it will add to your income. Plus it is close by. You wont have to roam around in sun trying to reach from one house to other house. They are also providing tea and snacks daily.

Maid: No, i don’t want to work there.

I: Why not? Give it a thought please. You will earn a lot more with lesser efforts than you have to take right now.

Maid: I don’t want more money. I like working at my current households. They are dependent on me. They don’t find a replacement even if I take a week long leave or fall sick. They never treat me badly.  I am happy with my work. Money is important, but not everything. Most of these households have helped me during my financial crisis, I can’t leave them for a few thousands extra. I owe them my loyalty.

I was astounded with her reply. She had a beautiful thinking. I was wondering that this woman who is barely able to make ends meet is so contended and happy and what’s wrong with me? Most of us are never satisfied with the progress that we make, the more and more money that we earn. We are always running behind materialistic things. If i compare myself to her, I have a lot more money (Thank God!), lot more luxuries (Thank God!), lot more education (Thank God!) than my maid but if I compare happiness, i think she is way happier than me.

What i realized was, her’s is a small world. There is no entry for unnecessary things (read luxuries) in her life. She is very clear with the distinction between necessity and luxuries of life. And hence, her life is full of happiness and satisfaction. She has lesser necessities and more happiness.

Sometimes, Less is More, isn’t it? 🙂

Like A Love Song – Book Review

Like a Love Song

My friend Pooja gifted this book to me on my birthday and it was such a lovely gift I tell you!

Like a Love Song is a love story authored by Nikita Singh and she has done a good job. I had never read Nikita’s work before and this book set a good opinion about her in my mind.

The story is all about Mahi’s life, dream and the people important to her in her life. It is all about how she gets dumped and fucked up her life. Nikita has penned down Mahi’s first relationship to a great detail. She has perfectly captured the attitude a 17 yr old would carry. She has portrayed Mahi beautifully. I could see myself in her in bits and portions and I am sure you will relate to her too. She is more of a live person than a character in the story.

I liked the fact that she has shown the protagonist as one little kid who messes up her life, drops out of college, fucks her relationships and almost destroys her dream. It all feels so real unlike other novels where the lead character is “know it all” kinds with great looks and super brains.

The entire story is knitted together against a plot of Mahi’s relationships and dreams. It is interesting to unfold Mahi’s life and Nikita has done a great job in keeping reader’s interest alive till the end. It does get boring in between when Mahi is shown hell bent on dropping out of college the second time, this time to chase her dream. But i think such things could be happening  in reality.

I loved the intensity with which Nikita has narrated the “post breakup” Mahi (the first time) and all her efforts to put herself together. It will really move you. Another powerful narration is towards the end of the story where Mahi has blown out practically everything that was important to her like her family, best friend, her love and most importantly her dream. You will really feel bad to see her in that state.

The falling in and falling out of the love will consume you, it consumed me at least because I hate to see personal relationships falling apart even in movies and novels. I personally think the end could have been better because I believe in happy endings but yeah, life is not always that kind and Nikita has captured that really well.

I think Nikita could have done a better job for describing “falling in love again” phase of Mahi. She did show her inhibitions but i feel should could have elaborated more on that and shown how slowly yet beautifully she enters the world of love again, rather than jumping in love after a small phase of holding to inhibitions.

All in all, its a good book. There is no moment of “what a crap story” or “it is so boring” but there are no moments of a great high either, apart from some power pact pieces i already mentioned.

Over all Rating: 3.5/5

P.S: I loved the character of Laila in this book :). Do read this book to find out more about Laila and Mahi.